Jay's oeuvre

A bit of jazz in blog, however, falls tremendously short of being a musical

Eagles Vs Phoenix

Perspective: Combos (An annual interdorm sports event.)

My team: eagles (Dorm 04,15,16,17 and 19)

Eagles have virtually done a rolling stone in being no. 2 all over. We have lost the finals in Tennis, Table tennis, Basketball, Carom, Pool and couple of Computer games.Now, We are to be tested in Badminton. With the team pinning hopes, that at least the curse of blue eagle would be broken.There are other stakes too .. my non playing team members have put a bet on us [how sadistic of them :(]

Eagles player :hinges around me and Paro. Maxi can support in doubles. I am yet to find another singles player to fill the matches.

Phoenix team :Hat's team he has like 5 above average players.

Format : Best of 5

Hence, its crucial that whatever games me and paro play, we need to ensure a win. I want to play a singles, a men's doubles and a mixed doubles.I have been a singles player for the Uni. team but the doubles r crucial.


1. Goddamn there 2nd best singles player is injured but can still beat any of my other team members with a love game. :(( .So that makes 1-0 in their favor.

2. Maxi my doubles player is in Bangalore and he wants to play all the doubles (promises he will win them). I am skeptical and want to play one of the doubles myself. So, the two doubles cant be decided.score 1-1.

3. Paro is damn good in ladies. (however, she going through one of her personal issue). Still wd expect her to romp home.. so 1-1.

4. I would most likely be pipped against their best singles player. Though I have beaten HAT, but in practice matches he at times takes the game home and I am a slow starter.Gimme benefit of the doubt:P, then its 2-1 in our favor else we lose:((.

5. Hey!! did I tell u my recurrence of mystique in my stomach ?.. he he he.:P haven't had proper food for last two days.(But thats usual with me). I have just ordered one glucose pack and some glucose biscuits.(fuel).

6. Aaah. lolz. I got an exam 2morrow early morning.(where I have scored a D+ in the midterms.)

Your Job : still need to mention.. wish me luck .. the game will prolly start in an hr. (1 am)

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by JAY @ 12:46 AM |Show/Add (14) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Facebook | Stumble Upon | Google | Technorati | TwitThis

14 Ants in my pants:

At 11/30/2006 11:46:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

best of luck, bro. break a leg, snap a neck, and win a peck while u're at it :-)

At 12/01/2006 01:26:00 AM, Blogger JAY said...

Oh yeah !!! .. i lost dude .. I lost the singles and men's doubles ..Only won the Mixed one .. Thats pathetic.. :((

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An Interview with a Vampire

(Its another long post .. But worth it razz ).
This happened like an year ago, but I would remember it for a long time. This was a crucial interview.

I reached there on time .. everything was set and the process started soon. I had some stupid query for which, I approached one of the administration guys and shot the Q. The tall and towering figure turned, stared at me disparagingly and answered in his Amitabh like Baritone. He was an impressive man. He dismissed my existence as silly.
Soon the group discussion followed. I did well and it gave me the confidence for the final interview. As usual in the interview, I was the last man in.

The person who had ignored me as if I am the crap on a car bonnet, was there right in the middle of the three member panel giving me little idea of how I had underestimated him.
Those who don't have the patience, can straightway go to(click it) [ Fun with Mr. Guha]
The Questions touched some agricultural issues about which I had no idea. I candidly said I don't know the technicalities. He egged me on for guessing the answers. I accepted the challenge (who cares if I was no where near the right answer or had hit the bull's eye). After a few rounds of Qs on medicines, the discussion moved to my Hobbies.

So what else do u do?
"I write, read and play badminton" (I had practiced to fix only these three, which I can defend)

What do u write?
"I write whatever comes to my mind. Right now I am working on my biography and a story based on the unsolved Purulia Arms drop case"

hmmm, ok leave it. U play badminton.
Tell me Why is All England Open Badminton Championship called so
"I don't exactly know y they named it so. It was a long time back."

So there are'nt any reasons.
"well I guess (they nodded yes, yes .. guess) It was opened to all (global) hence it was called so.. and it was touted the World Cup at that time.."
So why is it still called so
"I guess the tradition has to play a part and it stayed"

Why our event isn't called so?
"It cannot be called All England Badminton championship. One .. cause this is not England and two it is not open to all "

They laughed.

Ok, tell me the point system?
"Well they keep it changing. Right now it is 5 sets .. with 7 point each game."

So , Its nice.
"I don't think so sir.. The game is faster but it doesn't suit Indian shuttlers. They r slow"

OK leave it. What do u read?
"Anything, I am a voracious reader. Feed on anything I can lay my hands on"

Oh yeah!. what kind of books?
"Sir, I am not a fan of any specific genre. I pick books of different styles"

"Like Historical I Picked HITLER, fiction GO Small things. Fiction Grisham, etc"

The Last book u read?
"Da Vinci Code"

Haah !! Crap. misleading .fodged.errr. history.
"Sir, I don't agree It was a fiction and anyways History is semi fiction. So, I enjoyed it as a good thriller set against an unconventional backdrop."


Fun with Mr.Guha
Most of the talking was done by that Tall persona and a few by the person on his left. The third person was quite and watching me till..

Do u know William Dalrymple?
Ummmmm, I have heard of him but don't remember exactly. May be White Mughals??

He asked me about another Author..
Obviously, I had no idea.
Another one.. Do u know Ramchandra Guha?
"umm read of him but cannot recall any particular work from him."

U donno..?
"RamChandran , I have read his articles in Times of India"

U said Ramchandran?

"Oh! my mistake its Ramchandra"

The Q changed lips (The baritone again).
"No.. Why did u say Ramchandran? Do u think a name like Ramchandran Guha is possible.
Isnt he a Bengali.?
"yes sir his surname Guha suggests he is a Bengali"

So, why did u say so? Do u think a name like Ramchandran Guha is possible?
"Sir, yes the name seems unlikely. However, this is a strange world anyone can have any names"

They started laughing ,,... Bullcrap!!!
I interrupted their joy.

"Sir , when a guy called Baddruddin Qazi named himself Johnnie Walker .. after the bevarage brand.. anything is possible...So, its a strange world"

Mr. Goliath made a serious face and said " don't you think there is a difference between an inherited name and an adopted name?"
"Definitely there is . But there can be other possibilities"

"Like.. may be Ramchandran Guha's perents were of different community and to have a compromise they named him so .. Surname of one parent and the 1st name from the other one."

They again started laughing(goddamn how much I made them laugh

So, what do you think? who was who?
"Sir, may be his dad was a Bengali coz he has the Bengali surname and his mother would be Tamilian (coz of the Tamilian 1st name)"

Silence .. They stared at each other for a while.

Mr. baritone stares at me and says :
"You know u have a foot in your mouth"

Man!! I was shocked and scared.

They asked a few more and then said .. You may leave now .. and do take some biscuits u have talked a lot.

The sadistic panel comprised of some of the distinguished gentlemen in Academic fraternity
Prof. Sriram
(Mr. Baritone.. I faced him later in class. Never dared to talk back on him). Prof. Raghuram (the silent person) and the third was Prof. Diptesh Ghosh.

Thanks and good bye.
[Read more...]

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by JAY @ 7:05 PM |Show/Add (4) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Facebook | Stumble Upon | Google | Technorati | TwitThis

4 Ants in my pants:

At 11/28/2006 10:43:00 AM, Blogger Ish said...

Haha that was a sad panel surely.When I came across to William Dalrymple..I thought I'd heard of it but when I finished reading the whole thing,it struck me that he's a player in the West Indian cricket team :))..or maybe the South African team..dunno he's some cricket player.

nice explanation for Ramchandra Guha :))

At 11/28/2006 05:43:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

lol Thanx Deado..

but Dalrymple i suppose is teh Author of White Mughals..As they were asking about my reading habits..at that time..

or isn't he ?? :-?

At 11/29/2006 07:49:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sounded more like an Interview with 3 Vampires! Better yet, a Vampire and 2 Lycans. While the voracious duo were eager to blunt your parrying witticisms, the silent one was stalking to strike deftly at your weak points which you claimed were your strongest. And boy, did he draw first blood! Damn good show you put up, though, aint easy preserving ur ilk before those ivory tower vultures :-)

At 11/29/2006 08:45:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

He He .. Thanx .. yeah. I liked the way interview went. Later i found what a mistake i was doing by clashing with those titans .. One of them would literally rape any student in his class. Thankfully he didn't remember my interview.


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Food for thought

My sick food has arrived and the look of it gets worse :(. Speaking of food and looking at the observation that down south Slim's uncle and cuz are also suffering from Diarrhoea/Dysentry; I was fondling with the idea that whether Diarrhoea is the gr8 Indian unification symbol apart from Cricket and Bollywood.

Talking of food, I just attended a guest lecture from a Manager in Nestle, the biggest bulliest of them all, in food globally.He threw some insights which were processed in me with the perspective of a despo blogger.

The Point is passion for food and sensitivity towards it cuts across the border but still we are a nation of variety. Thats y we see global brands cant displace local namkins( Haldiram is the lord of the rings.) Lays(Potato chips) had its ups and down ... it is the food of a global Indian who represent less than 10% of India. The pseudo intellectual and a bullcrap population. (Hey!!! the angst may arise from the fact that .. I for most part of my life belonged to something which can be characterized as a "ASPIRING TO BE" Indians.. weird? huh!).. Anyways, did the global Indian knew .. that Lays coming during the summer is of better quality than what comes in winter, which is about 30% darker.(Goddamn!! how wd I know about any Pepsi product... ask Komal, she is the quintessential Pepsi girl). They tried to grow Atlanta potato in India but they failed.

Food and health is a great misnomer in here. What u consider healthy is not the perception. Diet Coke has less than 1% market share. They tried to launch Lays with less fat (gr8 hoopla).. however it failed... (Man !!! Indians cant compromise much on taste).. Those, who were raving about the project ..all those women were ordering extra Samosa. Dude in some part of India .. we still want to see a person of "khate peete ghar ka ladka" (the guy from a well to do family) which in normal terms would mean the guy should not be lean.

Not only that, some of the food items were decreased in quality to streamline it with Indian tastes. Poor thing tho not everything goes with the food MNCs. They try to push quality and health standards. Nestle did a lot of research in Singapore to provide Indians with a non-Maida Maggi .. 'Cause mothers refused to feed kids with those maida containing Maggi. Too bad for Maggi they still don't use Coriander from england cause our coriander doesn't suffice their quality requirements.

If ur wondering what is Maggi.. Its is a packed noodle.

Noodles .. thats the essence of china.. You see while I finish this article, I have another stir in my bowel which makes me think; This diarrhea and Noodles thing can be A great Chinese Conspiracy to render Indians less efficient and non competitive. After all we are the two nations with mind boggling GDP growth figures and yeah Chinese food is something which resembles our food the most.

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by JAY @ 2:30 PM |Show/Add (5) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Facebook | Stumble Upon | Google | Technorati | TwitThis

5 Ants in my pants:

At 11/24/2006 07:24:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Check my comment on previous blog for how to handle that horrible rectal splurge u're still havin'.

Can't these Nestle folks figure out yet that Indians are averse to packaged goods? Doesn't matter how it tastes, if it's cellophane- or otherwise- wrapped, the idea is there must be something artificial or GM (genetically modified) about it, and it's just a hunch, but I can see many an Indian turning up their noses to that notion. What turns up their 'lingam' is another story, though ;-)

At 11/24/2006 07:49:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

Trigger ... i am sure u must have idea about how to stop the Rectal Flow :P..

Trust me Indians don't have an Idea about GM food ( I have done projects on it :P).

There is another IDEA: "Can u understand the power dynamics of a mother who prepares and enjoys the delight of serving food"(Thats y companies have resorted to not snatch away her pleasure entirely but let half baked packed food which have to be garnished atleast b4 serving.)

What turns up our Lingam .. he he he :-?


hope you are feeling better

At 11/26/2006 04:45:00 AM, Blogger JAY said...

yeah thanx lizze I m fine now. I dropped the drugs and ate a tandoori chicken and it worked.


LOL what ever works :)


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Poop, Loop and one smoking barrel

Was debating with Robbie as to y his sissy would leave Australia and wanna Join any Uni in LA or wanna learn Textile in UK. .. Suddenly the clarion call knocked me off... and I headed for the loo.. It was to be the 6th display of disposal skills. Man!!!! last one week has been literally draining for me. Been suffering from diarrhea, would barely eat anything in the whole day. I have survived on Sick Food(Khichdi + Curd) from the student mess.

I thought of changing the Oflox + Ornidazole combi the doc .. ordered .. Cipro + Tinidazole is always a betta thing for me.. I shd have done it.

The Scary Part:
The Agony didn't stop there. One day, I have been sleeping since morning and at around evening mom called and informs me .. my nephew is suffering from the same and is admitted in hospital (some pedigree!! phew). The nemesis was an irritating Lactose intolerance in this case.

The Best Part:
I played with him a lot during my both visits. He had a strong obsession for my cell fone :((.

Not only that fate sends me another kid to compensate. This is Ashu (Don's son). Don informed of his K'log and yeah been addicted to it. Its so refreshing. (Don learn a few things from kid and upgrade ur blog :P ).

Bottom line (and its a smoking bottom, literally).

I am weak, have been sleeping only and have completed watching 2 seasons of two and half men. Thankfully, my nephew is home (yay!!.. u know this thing puts u emotionally down.. even if its me :|). Lastly look at what i ate .. it freaked out Robbie .. hi hi hi ugly.

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by JAY @ 11:03 PM |Show/Add (9) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Facebook | Stumble Upon | Google | Technorati | TwitThis

9 Ants in my pants:

Even my uncle and his son-in-law are suffering from this. Thats a coincidence. It must be an epidemic or something.

Ewwww @ what you ate... what is it anyway? :-&

At 11/22/2006 01:50:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

See .. and diarrhoea unites India :).

I ate .. Khichdi and curd :(


That's about the only thing that unites us ROFL!

Oh, that sucks lol. Get well soon. Think of all the junk food you can eat if you get better. That thought would probably cure you faster than pills :))

At 11/23/2006 02:12:00 PM, Anonymous robbie said...

ehh that rice shit, how could you eat that?? just a thought of eating it makes me balls disappear. And thats not rice, thats the noodles you ate which happen to come outta ur indian ass that way, you gotta chew properly mate:P

At 11/23/2006 03:15:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

he he he ... Yeah Slimo, I tried .. thinking .. i am ok .. and had DOSA :P.. lets not talk of the result tho :((.

RObbie... Fuck go and try Khichdi (thats wht i ate)... Its awesome in taste .. u may try eating it blindfolded .. :))


ugh pukes.

that's chicken poo!

At 11/24/2006 01:56:00 AM, Blogger JAY said...

Ask the French gal ;)).. how good this chicken poo tastes .. :P

At 11/24/2006 07:15:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Awful sorry to hear you had a dreadful time. Sounds real bad. I advise you take high-carb meals or snack bars to wean off it. Sorry I didn't check ur blog sooner.

Look at the bright side: at least yo're running your A-hole instead of your mouth for a change :D

At 11/24/2006 07:58:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

Oh thanx Buddy for the advice. I have been taking precaution in food stuff.

He he he and glad to see u using ur mouth instead of ur A-hole for a change :)).


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Forehands from Tursunov

I have read quite a few tennis blogs. Tursunov(..well if its tennis it has to be a Russian), comes on top of all the players who have dabbled with some writing. He is known for his tongue anyways so i was expecting some sparks when i opened his blog page. He didn't disappoint me... (He was on a high after helping Russia beat USA in Davis cup semis and then clinching his 1st ATP title in Mumbai, India.)

His two cents (from his blog )...

Excerpts from Dmitry's first blog in Estoril (May, 2006)
By the way, fans don’t realize how much time tennis players spend online. Dinara [Safina] probably has every song on the planet into her laptop. Marat downloads so many movies it feels like he is planning to open Blockbuster Video in Moscow. Gael Monfils is nuts over MSN. A couple of days ago he was sitting in the lobby and, I’m not kidding, talking on six MSN Windows at the same time. The guy is like Neo in Matrix. He has no idea what he is writing anymore or who he is writing to. He just puts “lol” and moves on to the next window. The girl is probably telling him that her kittens died and he just says, “lol.” At the same time he is listening to Bow Wow and tries to sing along. The funniest stuff on Earth. A French dude is trying to rap! Impossible to watch without a condescending smile!

Wednesday, Oct.04
6.55 AM:
Rise and shine! Time to…. “DISEMBARK”! Can’t wait to get to the hotel and open the bag with soaking clothes from my final’s match. By now my laundry is like a good wine. It has been aging for 24 hours in a plastic bag. I wonder what my chances are to get it washed before the match today because I only have one match shirt left. I got thirty pairs of socks though! Isn’t it exciting?! "

Thursday, Oct.05
11.30 AM:
........ Instead of running around the court and risk getting an injury I slapped some forehands at the back of the fence as hard as I could. The fans loved it! They shouted, “Godzilla returned! Godzilla returned!” Some even took photos of the fence where the ball left a mark. What is it with Japanese and their obsession with cameras and taking pictures?!?!

and this was the best:-

Monday, Oct. 02
9.50 PM:
Our driver is driving like frenzied Narain Karthikeyan (Formula 1 driver)! He's making Evel Knievel look like a DMV poster-child for exemplary driving. I'm starting to wonder how much "Esurance" (a car insurance company who is sponsoring me) would quote him for, for an insurance policy if they actually saw him drive. It’s pouring and the streets are filled with cars, motorcycles, animals and people who are celebrating Mahatma Gandhi’s birthday by dancing and banging drums right on the side of the road. It’s a total chaos! You can’t describe it in words, you have to experience it. “Drop-Zone” at an amusement park is like picking your nose on a sunny Sunday afternoon comparing to this ride. Even though it’s a lot of fun, it’s a bit scary. The ultimate testament to our driver’s skill is the fact that he is able to make it to the airport in under an hour. The trip to the hotel from the airport at midnight on empty streets took us just as long. Schumacher would probably still be stuck at the first intersection with his blinker on trying to merge and drive around a herd of sheep. As hectic as it is, in the two trips to India I have never seen an accident. Residents of Boca Raton, FL should take lessons from Indian drivers!

After this i checked out his US open ..stuff and was equally good. The last good tennis blog i read was of Ljubicic when was he was in Chennai Open but Tursunov is a vast improvement.

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by JAY @ 6:35 PM |Show/Add (6) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Facebook | Stumble Upon | Google | Technorati | TwitThis

6 Ants in my pants:

lmao .. at that safin thing duh .. its funny hehe wow !! i know my mom is an awesome driver too !! and so am i :P hehe .. jay when u come to gurgaon i gonna come to airport driving lol ..

At 11/19/2006 09:12:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

ha ha ha ......... reconsiders his decision to go to Gurgaon ..


no need :D .. u'll be in safe hands ;))

At 11/20/2006 01:46:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

what if those hands are a problem 8-|.. ha ha ha.

At 11/20/2006 03:21:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

lol what if u are a problem ...

dont worry .. i will call cia to hold you ;))

At 11/21/2006 12:32:00 AM, Blogger JAY said...

chhiaa!11 (rolling eyes)


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grrrillously chaotic

and u asked me y I needed someone to clean my bum!!1

(yup I keep everything at one place.. cant move myself.)

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by JAY @ 2:01 PM |Show/Add (20) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Facebook | Stumble Upon | Google | Technorati | TwitThis

20 Ants in my pants:

Clean. your. laptop.

At 11/15/2006 01:59:00 AM, Blogger JAY said...

cleaning and me .. u must be joking... by the what r u doing when u r free.. i got work for ya.


Do you sleep there too? ;)

At 11/17/2006 02:23:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

lizze :| almost ... wait for my next pic ... (worries y lizze wants to know where i sleep :P )


yes I do :)

At 11/18/2006 03:18:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...



lol .. ur desk is cleaner than mine :D .. u cant beat me at it

At 11/20/2006 01:47:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

he he he .. i havent shown the real shit.. on the desk..

(u have shown ur desk .. u liar.)

At 11/20/2006 03:20:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

arey that was last year !! when i used to enjoy studying :) .. and i am gonna show u some new pics then .. :D hehe .. show me the real shit then .. u are in competiton


That desk resembles mine :))



At 11/29/2006 12:09:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

Its Chic and happening.

slim u r a copy cat.

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My own group thing.. ;)

On Tuesday, we had a dinner .. thrown up by Navin aka Tuppe. It was more of a get together of our 1st year study group.

1st year was hectic down here. Thankfully I was partnered with a bunch of very down to earth people. We were a crazy bunch and we stuck together for all the three terms in the 1st year, though . other groups were disintegrating.So here is the crazy bunch we had fun with on Tuesday..

Srini(aka tHorny): returned to India after six yrs in US cause he felt home is calling. Too bad he is having a brush with reality now.Got back to study ...is on a sabbatical ( His employers r taking him for granted .. hua hau hua). A techie...
latest issue : marriage and has just found He is a Manglik.
(omfg... That means he can marry only a Manglik girl and they are rare :| )

Oh! I didnt add the nicest guy i have met.

Navin (aka Tuppe):
Thyself is double the volume I am. After leaving IIT KGP .. only thing he misses is his Boozing capability.
latest issue: 1st year was betta, atleast the academics kept him busy. Now he is too bored with nothing much to do ..

Sirji, made us cover another 6-7 km for a sizzling brownie he likes .. after we had our dinner.

Ami (aka Mimi aka Psycho): The 1st thing i asked on the dinner table is "u got engaged? (look at the pic .. it seems so)" .. She ain't but soon she would. She is a "nice gal". One should have seen her bursting the ass of one of head honchos in front of the whole class.. where does she store so much anger!!
Latest Issue: Problems of plenty.. Levers have already offered her a job .. Hubby is by her side .. things r too peaceful ...:-?

The Missing Gems

Vyom (aka Rancho) : he is cooling his heels in Germany as an exchange student(That guy is obsessed with Germany he went to Germany when he was in IIT Kanpur.. now here too .. y the heck.)
latest Issue : which part of Europe he didnt roam around. "damn gotta go back to college now:(("

He has been a prodigy .. million dollar brain... envy envy envyyyyy.

Jay (aka Bhookey) : forget him.

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by JAY @ 2:08 AM |Show/Add (11) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Facebook | Stumble Upon | Google | Technorati | TwitThis

11 Ants in my pants:

why forget bhookey .. dont u have anything to write about him

At 11/10/2006 01:07:00 AM, Blogger JAY said...

Nopes he is already very self centric.




He-he, Jay! U realy r cool band /bunch/ if I can understood well all and u r happy with ur friends. I can imagen how u r fell when u r with them coz mine 2 collegues that we r in one group r too cool and funny and then the work go easy and all that we do is funny.
But realy why haven't anything for Jay (aka Bhookey)? And why we must forget him? Add and for him :P

At 11/11/2006 03:20:00 AM, Blogger JAY said...

ha ha ha u all know him ... dont u guys?

and yeah they all are nice ppl.

At 11/13/2006 12:29:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

hiyah bhookey
this here's manny
could u nicely
shake ur laffy-taffy:-)?

At 11/13/2006 12:43:00 AM, Blogger JAY said...

Trigger ur Getting sick sick sick ..... I know i am Irresistible but ..eh.

At 11/13/2006 07:14:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

It just sounds like such a girly moniker to me, 'Bhookey':-)...


I envy you, because I'm a one man show. But then again, most bums are a one man show.

At 11/19/2006 09:09:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

aww my gawd,
u write some great stuff here.
and i so ency u guys.
u had such fun that day !
now i dont care who, but someone's gotta give me a treat as soon as i am back in campus!!!

At 11/19/2006 11:36:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

ha ha ha welcome back Vyom ... yups the next treat is planned only when ur back .. psycho is gonna be throwing the party.


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Jagshemash Borat

(which means How r u Borat)Borat Sagdiyev, originally Sacha Baron Cohen, is a funny character. I was introduced to this insane guy in the Da Ali G show on HBO. Then, I saw one of his movies where he mocks the British parliament. He is in news cause of the controversy surrounding his mockumentary : "Borat: cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan".

Here is an excerpts from his biography :

Borat Sagdiyev is a Kazakh reporter who was born in 1972 in Kusek, Kazakhstan. He is the son of Asimbala Sagdiyev and Boltok the Rapist, who is also his maternal grandfather. He is also the former husband of Oksana Sagdiyev, who was daughter of Mariam Tulyakbay and Boltok the Rapist. His relationship with his mother seems to be unpleasant, and Borat has commented that "she wishes she was raped by another man." Borat has a sister named Natalya, who is regarded as the 4th best prostitute in Kazakhstan, and with whom he often fornicates; a younger brother named Bilo, who is mentally retarded and must be kept locked behind a metal door or in a cage. In an interview, Borat said, "My brother Bilo has a small head but very strong arms. He have 204 teeth (193 in mouth 11 in nose)! You can do anything to him - he do not remember nothing! He is a sex crazy ... all day long he in his cage look on porno and rub rub rub!"

"......Borat's hobbies include ping pong, disco dancing, shooting dogs for fun, and taking pictures of women on the toilet....Borat claims to have the tightest anus of his village, tight enough to open a bottle of Pepsi."

"...He was sent by the Kazakh government and television network. He has also said that if his movie about the United States isn't successful, that he "will be executed".

Borat walks side by side with controversies. He himself is Jewish but he is seen as the flag bearer of anti-semitism. The tennis room chaps can recall Croat the weirdo had once nicknamed himself after Borat.

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by JAY @ 12:52 PM |Show/Add (13) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Facebook | Stumble Upon | Google | Technorati | TwitThis

13 Ants in my pants:

Hahah, I saw the trailer and was LMFAO! He is really funny.


Sounds like some obnoxious, freakishly degenerate reject of society that TV found lucrative to exploit. I think I'm gonna gag >:P

At 11/08/2006 02:15:00 AM, Blogger JAY said...

Trigger Happy He is a funny guy ...

Yeah< Slimo the Movie is already a hit.. However His ALI G show was also good.,, Then i saw a spoof on cricket and one on Cannes Porno Festival.


Have you seen the press conference he makes outside the White House? So so funny.

The PM of K. put out an official statement about Boral (or something). Boral then calls for a press conference and mainstream media shows up. He starts talking and give it a minute or two you can hear the journos sniggering and realising that this is a wind-up but they keep playing along. Great stuff!!


And oh .... jagshemash is Polish

At 11/08/2006 08:40:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

Lolz Lizze.. I found a Borat** press conference (in Paris).. Not the one u suggested :(.

This guy Indeed is funny and yup ppl play along with him.

And yup Jagshemash is Polish ... on of the words from Borat's lingo. Other words he uses are "Khram" "Wa wa wi wa" "sexy time" "Vazhïn"..so on.


I saw the film yesterday ... OMFG how funny .... never stopping .... what about the bear??????? .... the 'sexscene' superduper.

Do you think the ending was real or acted??


lmao !! croat .. eee!!! lol this is funny .. wish he sees it ..

At 11/09/2006 07:06:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

Yeah, Komal Croat is a big fan of Borat ... he knows almost everything Borat does.

Lizze :(( don make me jealous i haven't seen the movie yet ... I have seen only clips and read ... and watched his earlier works.


oh jay I am sorry !!!!

I thought you had seen the film.

I just read that Russia has banned the film cos of sensitivity of race and religion (?????)

At 11/12/2006 02:12:00 AM, Blogger JAY said...

He he he thats ok ..

Sensitivity .. well i am sure he runs a lot of sensitive people the wrong way.

I wonder wtf Kazhaks r doing?

At 11/26/2006 01:35:00 PM, Anonymous robbie said...

saw it today :))Hilarious! btw dont even think abt talking a chick to this movie lmao

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Toufee and clipmarks.

I had added two extensions recently to my firefox. One was performancing and the other was clipmarks. Clipmarks made me stumbled upon this nice site called toufee,where u can make flash movies, banner, etc online. Its very simple and wd come in handy for a layman. I made my 1st movie .. and here it is..

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by JAY @ 11:55 PM |Show/Add (2) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Facebook | Stumble Upon | Google | Technorati | TwitThis

2 Ants in my pants:

Jay, I saw the video, it's cool, really!

At 11/08/2006 02:17:00 AM, Blogger JAY said...

Thanx ...Anny.


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PENis Mightier than Sword.

Type: Theatrical
Skill: histrionics
Battle of CR-6 (CR= Class Room)

It looked hazy. I could only figure out some movements in between the woods. I took my position which was strategically apt for hiding from any offensive of the enemy.

Soon, the lord of the rings had entered. Everyone settled. My closest aide elbowed me to morning.

The tension in the air was palpable no one had a clue what the professor demanded when he said "How do u do appraisal of working capital loans". That was enough to disconnect me from the proceedings. I wanted to go back to sleep but, it was not to be so..

Looking at an complacent opponent, the guy sitting on right took out his naked shining pen .. and ***click*** my hand was almost pierced.. My mouth opened to gasp .. but the voice was choked within. (I hadn't expected he will take revenge for yesterday's powerful display of my penwork.)

I quickly searched for my pen ...only to find to my utter dismay "they" had it planned to perfection. All my accessories had already been removed. Only think i could do was to look at the watch and wait for the lecture to end.. while my adversaries kept bleeding me and ... their Gothic "muahahahahahaha".

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by JAY @ 11:05 PM |Show/Add (2) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Facebook | Stumble Upon | Google | Technorati | TwitThis

2 Ants in my pants:

Hehehe ... that is wicked.

And what do you mean with "appraisal of working capital loans" is a tad bit dull???

At 11/08/2006 08:56:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

Ummmm.. If ur prepared to do well in the class its not boring..Its a Finance topic where you asses The Loan to be given for running a business or project.

Yeah .. now u can gauze it wasnt a Harry Potter Stuff :(.


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Vodka Nites..

3 bill : what's up ?
PG : Yaar, Kya boloon? (Dude, what should i say) I am always confused what to say when some one says WHASSUP.
Jay : say "nm"
PG : I usually say my silly thngs as "the sky" "the roof" etc.
Marli : or "the stars"
Chandu: "the constellation"
Marli: Like "orion"
Chandu : Orion?
Marli : Yeah a constellation
Chandu : yeah but I thought Orion is just a group of stars.
Jay : Thats what a constellation is .. ain't it?

PG: whatta intellectual discussion.

This was a week ago. We were intoxicated with the Vodka arranged by dubious means in this dry state. It was a surprise birthday treat for Tiru ... so who cares and i had Vodka after a long time.. Flipside's stupid birthday song. Cake. Dance. Jokes. Dope. grrrrrrr.

I repeated I had to send some important emails to an organization ..but they aint gonna leave me... and I sipped and sipped till I made some stupid SMS and prolly puked when i got back to my room.. I dont even remember if I did regurgitate.

So don feel like writing anymore.. just had a break from a hectic one week.. gonna sleep.

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by JAY @ 10:59 PM |Show/Add (12) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Facebook | Stumble Upon | Google | Technorati | TwitThis

12 Ants in my pants:

ohh my !!! lol .. jay are u alrite now ???

At 11/02/2006 09:51:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

yeah i am just fine.


Vodka + Flipsyde enough to knock one out for a long time. Next time, you might want to leave out Flipsyde LOL!


Aaaa, Jayjo, now i understood why u need for too many hours /days/ for dreams in the last days:))by the way...How many bottles of vodka u can drink :P?

At 11/03/2006 11:13:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

Slimo I didnt want Flipsyde that sucks.

Anny u want to challenge me in VODKA :-?


Uuuuf, Jay I don't like vodka. I can't drink spirits. I can give up, before i'm start.

At 11/04/2006 02:08:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

So u lose and i win :D


Hey, Jay - peace, dear >:D<..can u help me and answer - Why i can't write in KOMAL blog? :(( When i post message - there appear "Error". Sorry, that i write here, Jay, but i dunno who can ask and where..

At 11/04/2006 05:07:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

Ok don wry i will get it fixed and tell her also.

today in PN i will tell u how to get over it.

At 11/04/2006 05:10:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...



well even i cant comment on her blog :-?

At 11/04/2006 10:15:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

blogger problem for a while try later.


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Recent Posts

The new address for my blog is http://thejaywalk.blogspot.com/ and its called "The Jaywalk".
The obvious difference is that now it has a much simpler name and URL. The peeping pseudo-intellectualism with the complicated name, has been put to rest.

Yeah! I also have a new template -- which I intend to keep fiddling with. over next two months or  show. I have exported all my previous posts to the new blog. Relief !! ***If I were an effervescent teenager now - I would have said "that is kickass cool!"***

Those, who wanna know the simple steps to shift the blog can look in here >>
"How does she change her dad"

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13 Ants in my pants:

At 1/27/2010 09:11:00 PM, Blogger RAIN said...

一個人就像一個分數,他的實際才能是分子,他對自己的評價是分母。分母越大,則分數的價值越小。 ....................................................

At 2/14/2010 01:38:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

wtf man!


朝著既定的目標走,就不會迷失。 ..................................................

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genre: semi fiction

ratings: thumbthumbthumb

disclaimer: This is hardcore and meant to seduce a gamer; for others - about a decade back two nerds gave the world something called "google".

The tension between them was palpable. Silence, prevailed for a while, before he lowered his defenses, tamed his voice, tried to stretch his lips and murmured on the phone,"Sorry yaar ! Ab bola na sorry. I had a presentation to complete last night and that's why I couldn't talk. You know recession, we just can't afford to avoid work!". He looked at The Cross hanging on the wall, constricted his eyebrows, and fluttered his lips silently as if he was trying to say ,"last lie" - and then, he winked. Ever since he has played the Age of Mythology, he thinks appeasement of God is as easy as a click on the mouse. Yesterday's aggressive Atilla the Hun - was a more submissive one today, in front of The Queen. He had always used his sweet innocent voice like those piercing arrows of a brit longbowman or chinese chunokus to pierce the fortified walls of hers.

It was not just a silence from the other end of the phone but a genuine cultural tension between M of a male kind and F of a female kind.

F on the other hand knew it was a Trojan Horse (.. not in that exact term though, yeah! she called it "fake").

"So, did you lose or win?"

"Lost.. no!... I mean in what?"

"Age Of Empire... again.. what else!!" and angrily, she tightly clutched the pen lying in front of her. She disconnected the phone and hugged the pillow instead. She always wanted her Knight in the shining armour but not literally rolleyes.

"darn.. what a turn off!" he looked at the phone in surprise, "Wasn't the Paladin from the imperial age happened to be as charming as one gets!!"

Understanding Mills and Boons philosophy had always presented a great dichotomy in our population. The M of a male kind always thought dark of the "the tall, dark and handsome guy" refers to the color and hence, an Indian male fits the bill (**coughs**).

He rushed back to the mates waiting in the hall, with their eyes glued to the computer screen. An year after college, they were hanging out over a 3 day weekend at M's place.

He shrugged his shoulders and said, "Dude! you know.. women in the right side of 30 (your spouse or girlfriend) or on the wrong side of 30 (your elder sister or mother) - have never understood why a guy would ignore others for a video game or for that matter a cricket match."

He picked up his beer can and said, "Warriors!! next game - Continental against the Spanish in hardest and fast mode"

Everyone joined the rhetoric and said, "yay!!"

tagPost script from the friendly neighborhood:

Age of the Empire is a popular real time strategy (RTS) game published by Microsoft involving various civilizations and historical events. Well... it's bloody addictive.

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by JAY @ 9:13 PM |Show/Hide (3) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Stumble Upon

3 Ants in my pants:

At 9/08/2009 11:16:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i hate A.O.E

At 9/11/2009 07:27:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

I know you so totally do :(


jaybert my man!

i miss u guys.. n our AOE nights!!


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Jaybert is from Elbonia. Elbonia is a little known fourth world town in the communist Bengal. Elbonia has been famous only because long back a large cache of arms was dropped in its mainland to fight the mindless rule of Communists. However, all the hopes of a great renaissance died when the mighty people of Elbonia decided to use the rocket launchers to tie their cows.

Jaybert has been working in a city in the heart of the communists, disguised as a supply chain expert. Secretly, he works with the brotherhood to overturn the communists one day.

Just about two years ago, Jaybert had joined as a fresh and young graduate in an organization, and worked hard to expand the Supply Chain Operations. He expanded the operations for entire 2 years. He accumulated some net +ve accolades (summation of all the brickbats and accolades). Today, Jaybert has just executed a plan to reduce the warehouse area and make all the processes lean.
Pointy haired Boss - What next?
Jaybert - Do I go beyond and open more warehouses?

Pointy haired Boss - Please, feel free to do so as long as you don't ask for cash.
Jaybert - No Cash!!... ummm.. do I get a permission to go and try to win one of those reality TV competitions. This will get us cash, keep me busy for a few months and no one has to know.

Pointy haired Boss - What are the odds?
Jaybert - Let's say, If I compete as a transvestite with a big rack, in a show called Dancing Queen, I can at least reach the semis without a fight. The other option is to enroll into Big Boss, where the probablity to win the event is high even if someone lacks talent.
Pointy haired Boss - That's TV jazz and is risky too. I would need money to fix you to win the competition.
Jaybert - What do I do then? I don't have work. Are you gonna fire me?

Pointy haired Boss - Not really. I already got Catbert to fire your other colleagues. Who do I boss around? Besides you are too cute to let go.
Someone poking the "pitchspoon" twisted into Jaybert's sordid posterior, by now, goes unnoticed.
Jaybert - hmm.. What should I do?
Pointy haired Boss - There is one guy eligible to ask questions here and that's not you. Besides I pay you to think.
Jaybert - I can do one thing. There were two warehouses I built last year. I can destroy them now. It will take about 6 months and then, we can rebuild it ,which will take another 6 months. So, we get busy for the entire year.

Pointy haired Boss - great! I like it.
While you do it, keep some reasons ready for justification of your actions.
(Apologies to hard core ADAM SCOTT fans, for the shortcomings in the above piece especially the lingo)

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by JAY @ 3:25 AM |Show/Hide (1) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Stumble Upon

1 Ants in my pants:

At 4/05/2009 05:32:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...



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Check out this >> Lotsa Lota!

SMS Icon KK and send it to 56882 and vote for Kaushalendra

You do feel proud to be associated with such a person. So many of his batchmates like me, got lured by corporates - He decided against it. He has started "Samriddhi" - which delivers vegetables to the customers in association with vendors and farmers. He has involved every stakeholder in the entire value chain. Foremost he decided to go back to his roots - in Bihar - and pull it off.

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by JAY @ 6:14 PM |Show/Hide (2) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Stumble Upon

2 Ants in my pants:

NMTV Personalities of the year are NMMC SCC Sandeep Naik and commissioner Vijay Nahata

He is young, he is suave, he is tech-savvy and he defies the belief that politicians are a gang of good-for-nothings. Exposed to the world of politics at a young age, the younger son of Thane Guardian Minister Ganesh Naik comes from that breed of educated, young politicians that the nation craves for today. His dynamicity as a leader came to the forefront only after he took over as the Standing Committee Chairman of NMMC.

Read more…


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I was fresh out of college armed with a MBA, and was lodged in a plush Mumbai Hotel for the induction into a conglomerate. I had a room partner - Aditya, he was a Kannadiga (IIT + IT sector + overseas stint + MBA). He typified a generation of Super Techies, bred under the carpet revolution which has swept the nation in the past decade. The IT sector in India has been growing immensely, fuelled by outsourcing and some smart leaders like Narayanmurthy and Azim Premji. For many a IITian/NITian/BITian, it was obvious to board the bus.
These super techies were well educated and smart, but the job on offer was comparatively mundane. The money on the other hand was easy, there was lure of overseas stint, and a better quality of corporate life that the new IT companies offered.However, two things happened in this unholy alliance -

1. Soon, with an experience of 2 - 3 yrs they were bored and looking to get the MBAs by cracking things like CAT/GMAT etc.

2. The bored super techie, with ample time/money on hand and an easy tech access - got interested in Online indulgence into the Equity Market and its cousins . No wonder emergence of the online brokerage/penetration of internet/booming economy and the bored Super Techie in an IT company forged an alliance.

Aditya, fell prey to the "obvious second one", stated above; whereas,I was still as non serious as I was two years back (prior to my MBA days). Aditya, in the dinner table would randomly throw a few questions to me like - "given a chance which sector you would bet on?". Then, what would follow was typical MBA global gyan on sectoral growth. Real estate,Retail and Infrastructure would form the core of our discussions. One interesting thing he had revealed to me during such discussions was - his penchant to back companies with strong leaders and an easy way out is - the companies driven by IITians. Thus, he would discuss with me - IndiaBulls, its rise and future growth plans. I was impressed indeed. He would also explain his game plan - The Markets are on the rise and its gonna surge like this for probably next two years - Here is the chance to maximize our gains and then it will be a super neo Hindu growth story.

Its been one year and things have changed since then. I am looking to call him soon and let him know a few of the things that is happening now:

pencil. An erstwhile busy Investment Banker is finding time to comment on my Tagboard. Wackiness of his comments are not at all proportional to "the squeeze" in the market.( Who is etika eek).

pencil. A famous movie from 80s starring Charlie Sheen and Michael Douglas, is going to the editor's table and now the opening trailer would read "Once upon a time in NY, there was a wall street.."

pencil. Top 10 Email Spams: A forwarded email by a colleague of mine is finding a place into the top 10 email Spams. This was an email on the walk-ins for Lehman Employee's by another Investment Bank in India.

pencil. Corporate Bankers: With work, less likely to come by,the city bankers have installed NFS (need for speed) on their comps. No corporate client is likely to walk by, to borrow money at such high interest rates.

pencil. Jaywalking Jay is back to blogging - He has time to sit and fiddle around with his comp. The sudden space has been provided by the decision to cull new retail projects and go slow on spending.

pencil. Super techie Thorny is looking for start-ups. New projects are drying up for the IT biggies. Banking is a big customer.

pencil. My consistent cousin who talks once a year to me had called to say "Hi". During the conversation, he drops in the news of layoffs to be announced by the Steel sector in coming months and how he is wondering what to do. Surely, one option is to pass on the CV to me.

These fretting facts, though from different parts of the world they are, point towards one inevitable truth - The slowdown is here - before than we expected and more monstrous than we have ever seen.

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by JAY @ 10:05 AM |Show/Hide (0) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Stumble Upon

0 Ants in my pants:

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My Cellphone was incessant. The whole world breaks lose to disturb my beauty sleep, which anyways has long alured me since I moved outta college.

"Hello" A very impatient worried voice replied "Sir, there are people around with flags. Shouting and there is chaos. They want the warehouse shut"

There was no manager available and people down the rung didn't know how to face the adversity.

"Shut it and ask all of the workers to move out. We will start work in the evening"
Sukumar Pal, the Loss Prevention Officer who happened to be the localite, dealt with the crowd and coolly handled the situation. He got the shutters pulled down and sealed. Except for the security everyone was goarded off from the site.

After that, what followed, was an ugly day of phone calls all of which were answered with the explanations on future coarse of action on how deliveries to the stores can't be made today. It's been the second consecutive day of Bandh/strike called by Political parties. It had crippled productivity and to beat the blues, I was getting some work done by shutting the warehouse from outside while inside workers were going bout their work as usual. In the Repacking centre, all women workers had also turned up and production was up to meet the surge in demand and sales in the stores. Only, some localites got a faint idea what was going on inside and soon a crowd gathered there and demanded immediate closure.

Its been an year since I walked out of college and since then its been a roller coaster (..shouldn't I name this article The Rollercoaster Diaries). This wasn't a unique morning, but just a part of series of challenges thrown in past one year while living in THE COMMUNIST BASTION in India - Kolkata.

Only this time, the strike (Bandh) has been called to protest the Price hike in petrochem. The reasons for bandhs don't matter anymore. Every month we are plagued by 2 to three days of strike in this part of the country. The Party ruling the state and the opposition are equally vehement about protests and thats the way they do it - "Jay, the more ya sleep the more ya reap."

You may lose time but your deliverable in modern corporate ain't lowered. At times it frustrates and at times it makes you smile. There is a shining Indian story and there is this part still living with communist ideologies...

... and then there is Jay who can talk about the economics of price hike and inflation..

lol BullShit. "Chalbe Na" Shut the F@#$ up and sleep.

[In this era of celeb blogs - I donno how many are gonna read it. But hey! do gimme credit for a hungry man, who could not pile up his ration before the bandh took effect and all shops were shut, has written it :) ]

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by JAY @ 2:29 PM |Show/Hide (6) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Stumble Upon

6 Ants in my pants:

Oh, good to see you back again Jay Bhaiya! This is Ish..deado..you remember? I was wondering where you are..so it's Kolkata now. Situation doesn't seem very good but anyway, how is everything else going? It's great to see you again.

I also wanted to ask another thing, are you still a part of the iBored blog we had? If so, can you please send me another invite to that on this ID with which I'm posting a comment?

At 6/17/2008 12:49:00 AM, Blogger JAY said...

Hey, deado..
yeah been an ardous journey.. Wassup with ya ... live an kicking with a loads of blogging?
.. iBored .. yeah it shows in my dash board .. but i donno if i can invite anyone.. will check it some time.


I'm fine, still blogging yeah. Now looking to attend college. What's been up with you?

And don't worry about iBored. We figured it out ourselves.

At 8/03/2008 10:13:00 PM, Anonymous ruffles:p said...

yipppeee found ur blog at last!!!

At 8/06/2008 09:26:00 PM, Blogger JAY said...

heyz Ruffles .. ur a sweetheart. Loadz of love.

At 8/10/2008 03:41:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

hey super-child-prodigy-books-knowledge-know it all-logical explantaion jayyyyy


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We had driven hardly for about 15 min., yet it seemed an endlessly painful rock ride. Heavy vehicles would come from the front, flash their lights and we would have a complete blackout. Sitting on the pillion I would wonder how Mannu was able to guide our way into the darkness. Soon, Mannu interrupted my thoughts.

"Can u see anything".
"Me too'.

I smiled. "Then slow down the bike".


His left feet flicked on the gear peddle and the bike slowed down.

"Arre its too slowwww.." Couldn't complete it. Damn bump dram hump pump. I only had an idea something was going wrong. The front wheel wasn't on the road anymore. Seemed we were sliding down a pit. Suddenly, the body mass of existence flew in air. The laptop that was till now sitting pretty on my back, was suddenly over my head pulling me along.

My palm touched the ground 1st and the cell fone slammed on the flat hard road. (Sehwag's mom had advised to keep the cellphone mutthi mein - not my fault) I wasn't resisting any of these nature's call. I just let it go and with a sommersault I was 6 fts away from the bike. The Laptop was still hanging around though.

Pat - Jay gets up. Pat - he would assess this not the sets of MI2. Pat - Jay thinks he had a friend called Mannu with him.

My wandering eyes fixed on to mannu who was getting up. I started enquiring if everything is alright. He said "Yes, seems so. Look at my face it seems I am hurt around the forehead"

I looked at him, I could see his skull. His forehead had hit a stone and it had split the forehead open with a big cut. I said "nah, its cool. Lets try to get the bike on the road and move on."

Some bystanders helped me to get the bike back on track. I asked them If I could get a medic help somewhere and moved along. They guided us to a nearby engineering College. I enquired Mannu if you wanna go the college hospital and he refused. He was stiched in a small clinic near the college.
They all asked if we were students of the college. I said "oh umm we were, three years back. Now, Mannu teaches there and I have come to meet professors afer a long time".

The whole episode was no less exciting than experiencing . The only regret remained - "the flashlights and cameras around to capture the "somersault" or pretty chicks watching me do the act :(.

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by JAY @ 1:42 PM |Show/Hide (49) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Stumble Upon

49 Ants in my pants:

Yeah big shame that there was no cameras around .... would have been to see that ;)

Glad you + friend are ok


look this is the "diet" i told you about you should really enter the site :) bye enter the site

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Recently, I found this wonderful conversation between two of the most wittiest personalities around. May be this exaggerated appreciation is there, because I am fond of Boman Irani and his acting skills.
Cyrus: That’s also how you met Shiamak Davar
Boman: Shiamak is a wonderful, wonderful guy. He had come to my studio. I was taking pictures of him, trying to entertain him with my jokes to put him at ease because he kept saying he was ugly. He came back the next day and said, R 16;You know Boman, you should be on stage.’ He asked me to audition for a small part in Alyque Padamsee’s play “Roshni”… Alyque initially had rejected my audition. Shiamak insisted that he would not choreograph the show if I was not in it and I did the show, I did one song in it.
Cyrus: No offence to Alyque, the play was…
Boman: Go ahead and offend Alyque. It’s okay.
Cyrus: Yes, the play was really bad. And the only good part about the play was the pimp… you.
Boman: Parsi mothers are always very proud of their children. After the show, my mother asked around, ‘Did you like my son?’ They didn’t know who her son was. So she said, ‘The pimp is my son.’ Someone ask ed her if she wanted a lift, and she said, ‘My son will drop me.’ ‘Who will drop you,’ they asked from the other end of the lobby and she went, ‘My son… the… the pimp will drop me. Don’t bother.’
Cyrus: (laughs)
Boman: You’re making fun of my mom by laughing. But yes, growing up in a Parsi family, I’m used to Parsi moms. Every time the dhobi comes, she would go, ‘Tum idhar tehro. Main kapda nikaal ke aati hoon’ (You wai t here. I will remove the clothes and come).
Cyrus: (laughs)
Boman: You are laughing at my mom again. I’m offended. (mockingly)
Cyrus: Tell me about the classic romance. Your wife used to buy only 100gm of chips from your shop everyday.
Boman: Dumb me, I would not understand why she would buy 100gm everyday when she could buy in bulk. And then, it struck me that maybe…
Cyrus: Her version is that you were the one who gave her 100 gm everyday saying that you were not allowed to give more. But we’ll stick to yours.

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by JAY @ 1:21 PM |Show/Hide (0) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Stumble Upon

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"The wings of the plane kissed the terra firma and I woke up to my nervousness of having reached a city,I have never been b4. I slowly made my way outta the airport and found my cabbie waiting for me with a banner in his hand screaming my company's name. I lodged myself in the comfort of the car and soon my cabbie shot,"Wherre to, Sirr?"

"T. Nagar, Sivaji Ganeshan Road"
The smile on the cabbie's face broadens and he pounces on me with a barrage of beamers. " Ganeshaan Sirr.. etc etc etc .... MGR.. me .. Acctorr..." I nodded as if I was as attentative as I was in my biology classes when reproductive system was being explained.
Soon, the cabbie was at his work-lights, Camera,Action-Flassh moves his hands, flassh he folds his sleeves. Flassh he turns it towards me and flassh he points to a tattoo which said MGR.
"..me MGR..Sarr"

lolz lolz lolz.. I rolled my eyes and wondered- the craziness has been underrated.
This is Chennai for yo, me and all.. and its reputation for craziness about movies and movie stars precedes it. Actors like MGR, Sivaji Ganeshan, Kamala Hasan and none otha than Sivaji the Boss have ruled the imagination and fascination of the masses for ever. This is also the city of Balu(Slim), Don and Geela.
The Rest of the day was spent sleeping in the hotel room. (Damn!! was I scared to venture out .. may be I was.) Finally, in the evening, I decided to go out to City centre (its THE Mall here), Shopped, checked out a few gals (it was hard to come by in the ocean of men), browsed through some books in Landmark,ate at KFC and came back.


While coming back to the hotel, I met Murrugan.. His sweet smile .. finished my day on a colorful note.


by JAY @ 10:11 AM |Show/Hide (5) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Stumble Upon

5 Ants in my pants:

ytf didnt u call me ? u crazy ?


and who is Geela ? Dont tell me it another one of the flatlickians from the Tennis room ?

At 8/09/2007 08:44:00 AM, Blogger JAY said...

Ha ha ha I am still here .. i will leave today evening. I lost ur no.

Geela is my dormie and batchmate.

At 8/14/2007 12:54:00 PM, Anonymous Ish said...

How are you Jay bhaiya? It's been ages.

At 8/15/2007 01:03:00 AM, Blogger JAY said...

I am Koolz Ish.. hope ur doin gr8 too


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He is having a jaw of iron, a will of steel, and a heart of gold. He is called Ricky Babloa. He is my neighbor. The legend says there used to be a Sylvester Stallone fictional character in some hollywood series. Ricky's dad was a die hard fan of the movie. He would throng the local theater every month to have a glimpse of his favorite character. "baba wo maar waala picture aaya kya? baba lo.. jaa maar dey!!" [friend are they showing that action packed movie.... oh my!! he shows such stunts..]
The awe which had gripped him was palpable to the life forms which surrounded him. No wonder when a son was born to his passive wife .. he decided to name him after his GOD.


this was as close as he cud get to Ricky Balboa. Now, Ricky Babloa is a grown up young man and his physique would put his nameshake to shame. He is a towering 5 feet and is heavier than thy (prolly 45kgs). Whenever, I am back home he comes to visit me. We share a lot of information amongst each other. Now a days he is busy imitating some Bangladeshi folksinger. He painted his face and performed exactly like it was done by the originally artist. Later, I found it in youtube too. The Dayal Baba phenomenon.In deep roots of India people get more joy out of a Dayal Baba from Bangladesh than a Younis Khan (the nobel peace prize winner), Taslima (lajja etc etc) or Monica Ali(a booker prize winner for Brick Lane).
When it was my turn to share something with him. I couldn't resist but to tell him everything he always wanted to know about sex, and also, to rekindle his dad's movie mania we sat together to watch Woody Allen's first blockbuster. Ricky Babloa almost died of a laugh riot when the 2nd story in the movie started. It went on like this :

attach An Old Armenian guy visits a doctor. Doctor asks, " what is your problem?"
"Doctor, I am in love with a sheep". "A what..!!" "A sheep".

Doc is in shock he is just unable to utter any word. After a while he musters all his energy and patiently says," umm I see".

The Armenian guy, "U see doctor, in the heights of those Armenian Mountains. No body is out there. At times it gets lonely and I am not married. That night I was feeling so low and there she was .. so beautiful .. so serene.. soothing me.."

The doc," the sheep!!" ...." Yes, The Sheep" and the Arenian Continued,"I cudn't resist myself doctor.. I made love to her and it was the best sex I ever Had".

The Doc,"ok. So what is the problem?"
"You see Doc.. now, she no longer loves me.. I Can feel it .. It hurts. She no longer wants me, after so many nights together... It breaks my heart.. You have to do something about it doctor. My brother says you are Great. You treated him. I know no one else. you have to do it." And he rushes to bring the sheep in the clinic. Doc kept yelling behind his back... "stop, don't do that.. I am not a veterinarian."

But the sheep is brought in and doctor checks it and falls in love with the sheep.
Later, the doc's wife divorces him for adultery.

As soon as this story was over Ricky Babloa got up and said that he gotta get back to his home. I said that he should wait coz the movie ain't over yet. Ricky Babloa said, "My dad is alone in home, I gotta go fast".

I said, "oh! Is he sick?" He said,"No!!!.. I have 12 sheeps".

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by JAY @ 3:11 PM |Show/Hide (0) comments| Bookmark at Blinklist | Digg | Delicious | Simpy | Stumble Upon

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