Jay's oeuvre

A bit of jazz in blog, however, falls tremendously short of being a musical

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You do feel proud to be associated with such a person. So many of his batchmates like me, got lured by corporates - He decided against it. He has started "Samriddhi" - which delivers vegetables to the customers in association with vendors and farmers. He has involved every stakeholder in the entire value chain. Foremost he decided to go back to his roots - in Bihar - and pull it off.

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by JAY @ 6:14 PM |Show/Add (2) comments|

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The Bear Hug: Signs of Economic Downturn

I was fresh out of college armed with a MBA, and was lodged in a plush Mumbai Hotel for the induction into a conglomerate. I had a room partner - Aditya, he was a Kannadiga (IIT + IT sector + overseas stint + MBA). He typified a generation of Super Techies, bred under the carpet revolution which has swept the nation in the past decade. The IT sector in India has been growing immensely, fuelled by outsourcing and some smart leaders like Narayanmurthy and Azim Premji. For many a IITian/NITian/BITian, it was obvious to board the bus.
These super techies were well educated and smart, but the job on offer was comparatively mundane. The money on the other hand was easy, there was lure of overseas stint, and a better quality of corporate life that the new IT companies offered.However, two things happened in this unholy alliance -

1. Soon, with an experience of 2 - 3 yrs they were bored and looking to get the MBAs by cracking things like CAT/GMAT etc.

2. The bored super techie, with ample time/money on hand and an easy tech access - got interested in Online indulgence into the Equity Market and its cousins . No wonder emergence of the online brokerage/penetration of internet/booming economy and the bored Super Techie in an IT company forged an alliance.

Aditya, fell prey to the "obvious second one", stated above; whereas,I was still as non serious as I was two years back (prior to my MBA days). Aditya, in the dinner table would randomly throw a few questions to me like - "given a chance which sector you would bet on?". Then, what would follow was typical MBA global gyan on sectoral growth. Real estate,Retail and Infrastructure would form the core of our discussions. One interesting thing he had revealed to me during such discussions was - his penchant to back companies with strong leaders and an easy way out is - the companies driven by IITians. Thus, he would discuss with me - IndiaBulls, its rise and future growth plans. I was impressed indeed. He would also explain his game plan - The Markets are on the rise and its gonna surge like this for probably next two years - Here is the chance to maximize our gains and then it will be a super neo Hindu growth story.

Its been one year and things have changed since then. I am looking to call him soon and let him know a few of the things that is happening now:

pencil. An erstwhile busy Investment Banker is finding time to comment on my Tagboard. Wackiness of his comments are not at all proportional to "the squeeze" in the market.( Who is etika eek).

pencil. A famous movie from 80s starring Charlie Sheen and Michael Douglas, is going to the editor's table and now the opening trailer would read "Once upon a time in NY, there was a wall street.."

pencil. Top 10 Email Spams: A forwarded email by a colleague of mine is finding a place into the top 10 email Spams. This was an email on the walk-ins for Lehman Employee's by another Investment Bank in India.

pencil. Corporate Bankers: With work, less likely to come by,the city bankers have installed NFS (need for speed) on their comps. No corporate client is likely to walk by, to borrow money at such high interest rates.

pencil. Jaywalking Jay is back to blogging - He has time to sit and fiddle around with his comp. The sudden space has been provided by the decision to cull new retail projects and go slow on spending.

pencil. Super techie Thorny is looking for start-ups. New projects are drying up for the IT biggies. Banking is a big customer.

pencil. My consistent cousin who talks once a year to me had called to say "Hi". During the conversation, he drops in the news of layoffs to be announced by the Steel sector in coming months and how he is wondering what to do. Surely, one option is to pass on the CV to me.

These fretting facts, though from different parts of the world they are, point towards one inevitable truth - The slowdown is here - before than we expected and more monstrous than we have ever seen.

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by JAY @ 10:05 AM |Show/Add (0) comments|

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Smoke on the water

Crap on the water: This post was supposed to be titled "O Jay, Where art thou ? - part II". I realized (not so soon) that before I posted "O Jay, where art thou - part I" (last post), one of the notorious bloggers in the blogspace called Lizze had already posted with a similar title "O Michael, Where art thou". You may argue that replacing Michael with Jay makes it more spicy (puts a face biting its tongue) but it will also make me charter in troubled waters. This woman (supposedly) is becoming an American from a Londoner(prolly) and thus, the chance of her suing me for copyright violation has increased. I may do a Kaavya Vishwanathan and argue that I prolly derived the name subconsciously from a movie which goes by the name "O Brother, where art thou"; but trust me, it doesn't help. They all believe what they wanna believe (puts a sad face).



(please, increase the volume)


Smoke on the water: This wasn't supposed to be the arbitrary display that u just read in the prologue.(Lizze may just kill me for all that). It was supposed to be classical, non funny and tasteless essay.
The March heat was on. While all the students had gone back home or were holidaying, there were two guys, Lota ji and Nirmal babu still entrapped within the red walls of the college making charts, cracking data and calling important people to make the ends meet. These no non-sense guys were agribusiness management students and had declined big bucks for entrepreneurship. They were working on several projects simultaneously. This all had started when The Chief Minister of Bihar (a state), Mr. Nitish Kumar visited the campus last year. Several students presented projects to uplift the state and were willing to work there. The Minister gave a go ahead. They made a support group comprising the students. Each student would pursue his own project while the support group would provide consultancy and take a hit if one of the students fails in his venture. The ideas ranged from Rural Radio, Retail chain, Insurance plan for Rickshaw pullers, Extracting Ethanol from corn to various consultancy projects for the government. A lot of them are already on its way. Some of the national news channels splashed a one hour documentary on it. The word spread. Venture capitalists, Consultants and supporters from various parts of the country, USA and Europe started calling these people. Now, Nirmal babu says proudly "we won't need Bank Loans. Money is not a constraint. Not for me, not for you and not for any frog who wants to jump out of the well".
Energy rubs on me and I kept wondering, for the past two years where was I and what was I doing "O Jay, Where art thou".
Down South Goa. under a full moon and a clean sky, Jay was sipping wine on the beach along with his friends Medha, Danko, KG, Tiru and Jhade Singh. Jay was singing raunchy Bhojpuri songs one after the other and people were egging him on.
Medha: "abe! gaana aur suna na" (sing me a song) Jhade Sigh: " Do u remember e guddi".
Jay: " O yea, E Guddi.. arre ye Guddi!! aaa Khele chorwa sipaiyya"
"Banhiya mein dhar ke raja....(censored.)"

Jhade Singh was dancing and singing alongwith me. Jhade Singh completed his graduation last year and he himself had declined a good job offer to open "chain of spa and wellness centre" with Hukka. Last year, there were about 6 people who had decided to go on their own, this year there are 11. This year, there are several portals made by some of the students which have become huge hits. Among them "CRICSTOCK" (mixture of Cricket and stocks trading) and "10 a day" (a portal for CAT preparation)". Rights of publishing some material on cricstock was sold within months to a national news channel (NDTV.com). The deal ranged in Lakhs. Does it sound like the youtube story? My own baddie partner Paro had a plan in place for "becoming a supplier of a women's inner wear brand" (wipe off that smile), which will cater to somewhere between the high end and low end customer. Her pic was splashed in the cover page of national magazine. Imagine what kind of peer pressure it exerts on other people. Another friend dearly called Hilao, declined a Lehman Brother's offer because he wanted to indulge in real estate.
All these things don't demoralize me but make me proud. After all when a college is branded Harvard of India or the Best B-school in Asia-Pac, it has to shoulder responsibilities and produce entrepreneurs. So what, if people like Jay chose easy way out by working for some one else .

Well wait... Jay has a plan in place too . U may just hear what he is planing to do soon. So, wait and meanwhile stop wondering, y does the post has a title smoke on the water. Its cryptic.. he he he.

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by JAY @ 1:40 AM |Show/Add (4) comments|

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The Dawg is leaving

There are numerous videoz made every year. This one is one of the videoz, which captures and arouses my sentiments for leaving one of the best places on earth after 2 years. The video has been made by Proxy, who is now joining a Swiss Bank and its all about the Dormies. All the Dawgs captured in the video. ...................................................................I need a shoulder to cry now!!!!






There is this video from one of "the wannabe rival college of ours". The video is sweet and for our batch, thus, it reciprocates our feelings. It is extremely nostalgic :( and the composition is their own.

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by JAY @ 1:51 AM |Show/Add (2) comments|

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Total economix

As I am graduating, bypassing the Gyan distribution in my very own blog would be a gross error. So, I am gonna bowl short spells of friendly biodegradable knowledge from my wallet.

Last fortnight was a whirlwind in the economy. The inflation touched a mammoth high, the annual exercise of Budget by the Finmin was tabled, the top B-Schools in the country entered the campus recruitment season and the grand old man of intestine Mr. Alan Greenspan opened his mouth again.

Talking of inflation, the reason is a palpable supply constraint. Too much money is chasing too few goods. The growing demand is exceeding the production capacities. Among other goods, Oil and petroleum is a substantial determinant of how inflation would go. India imports heavily and pays in rupees for it. Now, we do not let the Rupees to appreciate (limited floating), hence we have to pay a lot to import the oil. If Rupee appreciates against the Dollar the imports would become cheaper and the prices of oil can be brought down and hence the inflation too. Having said so its not that simple either. It spells doom for the exports and especially the software companies like Infosys; which are heavily dependent on software and services exports. Infact, it doesn't seem a good year for software companies. After enjoying a tax holiday of about 10 years they have been brought under the ambit of MAT (minimum alternative tax). No doubt the response from Bangalore was meek and gloomy. Meanwhile, the inflation is yet to be tamed.

Much ado about nothing: Alan Greenspan predicted about 33% chance of a global recession. Considering the fact that global economy was overheating after enjoying a 6th consecutive year of recovery, it seemed a correction factor. Stocks across the globe which had started tumbling two days ago .. actually made a comeback today. Greenspan's words couldn't dampen it further.

The reflection in my home: Today IIM Bangalore, one of the premier management institutes in India, saw its Day Zero placements today. It wasn't as rosy as expected in a year when the economy has prolly grown about 9.2 %. Global Investment banks unexpectedly picked up very low numbers. While, back in college, we were discussing the placements in our group, I actually joked "Its a sign of global recession". Hell !!.... Is the recession really down the corner?

Hope not... anyways the panic button has been pressed in my campus, where the campus recruitment season is just a day to go.

Those who get the news from the media would prolly never know the pressure and tension of a gloomy and uncertain future some of the students are facing because by the end of it Management institutions manage to show a big picture which has all the colors in place.

The Agar Media: Management colleges like the one from where I am graduating should actually share the blame for the misquoted statements in newspapers and newschannels. At times, in the hunt of greater glory; the students also gloss the final fugures of campus recruitment and salaries being offered. There is this funny story that figured in one of the leading business newspapers:

"Indian Institute of Management, Calcutta students have been offered salary packages of more than 1 crore (10 million)..................
.............................. In fact, the IIMs in India have come of age as these salaries are about 50% more than the salary figure offered to Harvard and Stanford Graduates".

Eventually, students in these colleges know the missing link. So, a friend of mine called IIM, Cal questioning as to wtf!!!! are these figures. They replied "you started the game".

Yup, the 1st news of more than a Crore salary came out of my campus, which was offered by a leading investment bank. Well, if someone could get the structure of the overall salary being quoted, they could see, it includes a huge chunk as the expected bonus. ...And I talk of a bloated figure .. douche!!!!!

Talking about media, there is another news article which made our jaws drop and made us giggle. Read this : http://www.centralchronicle.com/20070303/0303102.htm.

This college is also among the reputed management colleges in India. Hopefully this press release was not a work of the college officials but the work of an evil genius called press reporter. Look at the spelling mistakes committed : Macancy, Assenger business consultant, Deloty consultancy, Goldman Saches, Duche bank, City group, Alghamin Industries,etc.

(The correction should be-McKinsey, Accenture, Deloitte, Goldman Sachs, Deutsche Bank, Citi, Alghanim). Some of them are the richest banks in the world and lolz imagine if they read the news article.

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by JAY @ 3:29 AM |Show/Add (2) comments|

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Need to write..

The evilllllllllllllllllllllllllll has been let loose.

I just finished the last exam in my life. TOmorrrow, I will start packing to go back home after 2 loooooooooong yrs, in which was prostituted by the books. (Doesn't feel bad tho .. I was a high end call boy of the acads lol).

By the looks of it, u should feel by now I am going crazy. Batasha was the 1st one I called in the moment of ecstasy. Then, I wanted to call others.....hell!!! some inhibitions stopped me from doing so. Anyways, so here I am; my heads swinging to the Voodoo child by Jimi Hendrix and my fingers moving fast over the laptop surface.

Tomorrow, The sexy-eyes-Doc is coming to the town for an Interview. He is my long time undergrad friend and is also known as the man of weird ideas in the Jay world. When we finished XII, we took admission into St. Xavier's college (not telling you which Xaviers .. na na na). So, the class had like 40 gals and 10 guys of which 3 wd remain absent. When we would sit in the Lab.. staring at the gals... Doc wd mention "Jay!!! when r they gonna make prostitution legal in the country. When wd my dream of opening a brothel be realized.Oh!! Amsterdam I miss u".
After a brief stint there in the college he followed me to the undergraduation (B. Tech.) and we had fun.......... the story thereafter is LEEE GEEEN wait a minute its coming DDDARY.

But, I will talk about all those later.. right now two stingy chopsticks .. a few sexy white grain of rice and an aphrodisiac called Water is waiting for me ........ I NEED TO EAT.

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by JAY @ 4:21 PM |Show/Add (14) comments|

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Monster's Inc. Ahoy

Legs tied to the branches, I too 've been hanged upside down
and I could see a room of corpses and closed doors
Smile, as we become a part of Monster's Inc.
U lick my wound, while I lick yours.

The days of untented innocence is coming to an end. Last few days in college and its a mad rush to get a job. Nites go by discussing jobs, the hype surrounding my college and the pressure it has created on students. Cooked up stories, whimsical journalists have a field day. The salary figures quoted in news papers are largely false. The media attention and public interest has created a spell, where everyone is expected to bag a job which is top paying. These jobs are infact restricted to a certain sector and to a few only. However, ppl are sacrificing their choices and jumping into the job profiles, prolly which, they are not made for. All because they are falling prey to peer pressure.

Last few weeks, I myself witnessed emotionally and professionally testing times.( I woke up to the fact that HR (Human Resource) guys are digging up Orkut Profiles to know about candidates. Orkut has been a genuine social networking site and experiences realistic expression among frnds. In this regard, it is by far more well-behaved than Myspace, Friendster or HI5. But then u can't blame the corporates, when they are hiring people by paying a sum, which is far above the national scene. They can't afford to hire people who gonna dupe them and dump them after a brief stay. Dog eat Dog...Corporate espionage is metamorphosing.

Too bad tho, my orkut scraps don't feed the spying eyes much. It still is a nightmare for me cause half of the scraps are all about "where have u been placed (=got a job)? what about the salaries". If there is an old friend on chat, its the same Q. If its a fone call, its for only one purpose. Anyways, I don't have anything bad, that I need to hide.(In fact, I have a pretty good one.. job I mean razz).

attach Talking of Jobs and readily available foreign exposures, I can't miss mentioning the story of Dildo and Nippo. Both of them got high paying jobs last year and are well placed in England. The story goes... During 1st few months, Dildo used to go out on weekends to clubs and pubs; while Nippo the conservative one wd stay back alone. He would pick a firang (white) chick and ask if she wd like to have a drink with him. Too bad .. no luck here dude. After constant failures, he started checking out eastern Europeans. 1st they wouldn't understand english. When they did, lol.. "no thanks". Dildo didn't get discouraged. He tried approaching Indians living in there. Lol, they won't even listen.

Now, Dildo spends time playing carom with Nippo in weekends.

attach U don't let ur go life like this. He he he .. so we have our share of fun at the high pressure situation. STD, Tiru me and Rubby have this tournament going on between us.

We have to play a series of sports. Me and STD on one side while Tiru and Rubby on the other. We already have lost Tennis 6-4 6-4 (don't listen if they say its 6-2 6-0). Today while we were coming back from Canteen at 3 am .. we decided to finish off the Badminton. Hola!!! we did play and we won .. he he he. So now the scores are level at 1-1 (Tennis goes to them and Baddie to us). The only game in which I am banking on STD is "wrestling". Hopefully he will get us a point in our Fightclub.

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by JAY @ 9:55 PM |Show/Add (2) comments|

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Body odor and women: POTtY tales

A few days back a stupid news item featured in our NEWS NB (Notice Board). It followed a long discussion, culminating into a grand finale.

The news was about how women are attracted by body odor of men and hence the deo sales should go down. It was the byproduct of so many trivial researches that toe-nail-chewing scientists do.

"Cortisol levels in the women who smelled androstadienone, a derivative of testosterone; shot up within roughly 15 minutes and stayed elevated for up to an hour."


Androstadienone is the male chemical signal. Here.....I drop it and there u get dropped.

Apart from the nasty scientific discussion we can indulged in, a lot of single male species came in with a new found argument. They justified their singledom and inability of female appeasement to their regular bathing habits and hygiene. Hydrophobia would result in a stinking male homo sapiens, which would coz the human body to be the fort of accumulated androstadienone and thus females would stick to him.

Soon, the repercussions were seen in the Annual POTY awards (Person of the year awards). A separate category was created for "hydrophobia award" for the one who bathes the least.

POTY nite didn't spring any surprise. Geela hosted the awards nite (which is also our farewell nite). The hydrophobia award was bagged by none other than our neighbor peepu.. Yikes!!.

Moment of reckoning came when "ADAM and EVE award" for the most sticky couple was announced and the winner was again Dopey and Peepu.

Geela straightway announced, their stickiness to be the true testament for the article on women and odor.

Geela: "Dopey; sticking with peepu, the hydrophobia award winner!!! It has to be true love...

.. but, Dopey..."

with frustration and anguish in his face, he screams: " .....HOW?"

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by JAY @ 2:21 PM |Show/Add (3) comments|

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Captain Courageous and His Dharma.


pencilForgive me for -
One- I indulge in excessive self adulation [Cause though it may be wrong, it doesn't take my right to talk about my feats.]..... and thus u have been lawyered biggrin

two - While I write this, I have already slipped into trance listening to one of my fav. bands Rammstein.

three - captain courageous has nothing to do with dharma. The story is in two parts.
___________________________________________________________________
Captain Cook

Interdorm cricket is something that takes the interdorm rivalry to a new level. Being the defending champions puts extra burden on us and considering we don't have the batting strength we had last year, our task is really cut out. Someone had put the team name in the notice board with me as the captain. Things really are weird here.

The taming bulls - Bhooke(cap). Geela. Chuli. Puchi.Cryo.Appu.TJ and Jhalak(wk).

The 1st match was against one of the toughest teams in the tournament and we, the defending champions entered the arena as the underdogs.We scored a pathetic 39. When it was time to bowl, the opponents made a mockery of our bowling. Soon, they were chanting "where is the next team". Our shoulders were down. Suddenly, Geela started bowling like a drunken monkey. Opponents started getting run out in a mad rush. In the last over they were supposed to score 5 runs to win. Yours truly and sincerely Jay took the ball. I bowled a negative line. The opponents gave away their wickets and lost by one run. Hurrays.It took some time b4 realization of the victory sank in.

Sounds Fatalistic. Atleast, we are through to Quarter Finals.

__________________________________________________________________
Dharma

In our leadership class, we had to make a presentation on "Idealism and reality" based on Iravati Karve's Book "Yuganta". We had three characters to portray "Karna, Aswathama and Krishna" (Tongue twister ?.. no doubt the exchange students from Europe excused themselves from this Hindu mythological discussion)

We planned a decent role play and we pulled it well too, except one technical goof up. I used one of my favorite Fonts "Samarakan"(below), but I couldn't install it on the classroom comp.



As usual the classroom produced some intense discussion splashed with corny display of humor which reached rock bottom.

The faculty is moderating the discussion and asks to draw parallel between the character of Krishna and Rama.

She says "Though both are considered Gods, Rama is the one people look up to and not Krishna.Even when Mahatma Gandhi was shot, he said Hey Rama"

interruption 1 - Ma'm, That's also because Rama is easier to pronounce than Krishna

laughter.

interruption 2 - Ma'm. actually the chant goes . "Hare rama , hare krishna." So, Gandhiji mentioned Rama first and before he could say Krishna ... he was no more.

man!!!!.

However, the following cracker was a bit respectable.

Characters of Karna and his quest to be recognised as one of the royal blood was being discussed, when some1 mentioned the dreaded word RACISM. Some fellowmen started giggling.
On being asked to share what was it that got them tickled, prompt came the anecdote-

Well, last Sunday we had been to dorm dinner and Mukul ordered SIZZLING BROWNIES.

To that Geela commented - "Had u been in England u would have been charged with Racism and atleast watchout that Shilpa Shetty is not watching"

The faculty later said " In fact, this city is famous for its' sizzling brownies."

.......

don't laugh. literally.

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by JAY @ 1:44 AM |Show/Add (5) comments|

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Battlehardened

This is hardcore. (Yup, not much is here for nubile minds.)

Rated - A
Theme - A hard Days Night



4:15 pm - I had put on my business casual and rushed to CR5. I took the comb in one pocket, so that I could rest the bouncing souls on my head called hair, to rest; while I walked to the CR5. If u are late u have to flush out 250 bucks.

4:30 pm- 5:30pm - the presentation by this company, which claims to be the 2nd largest FMCG in India (pre Gillete-PnG marriage) starts with the display of "uncommon sense", which is their idea of existance.
Well, one good thing they distribute After Shower Cream and a Aftershower Gel.

wierd.

Then, for an hour they go on to pitch in as to how wonderful it is to work in that organization.. I am impresssed.

5:45 pm- I rush to the computer center (I have been playing the Commodity trading game there). I see a slump in the silver and gold prices. I start buying a couple of lots. Soon, there is a news flash in Kitco.com that some funds have started buying Gold. Gold prices start to rise so wht do I do .. I take some short (sell) positions.

No prizes for guessing the bullion prices never go back .. and I start losing money. I decide to go back and sleep.

8:30 pm - I came back to room. and started reading a book "the new world of microenterprise finance". I was supposed to submit a review next morning.

10:00 pm - I couldn't resist sleep. :)

00:30 am - I woke up to reality. Start slipping the pages of the book. fast and furious.

7:00 am - I completed a review of 4000 words. Then, I started another book.

10:10 pm- I finish both the reviews. Rush to Ludo's room. wake him up. Start his comp and fire the print out. y don't they keep their system fast and running. geez. Meanwhile, far-far away from the maddening moments the class where the review was to be submitted has already started.

10:10 am - I enter the classroom with a thumping noise of hands hitting the desks and everyone staring at me.

Mr. Sriram welcomes me in the class."Did u submit both the reviews". I answer by nodding my head in affirmative. "Are u able to walk? (he he he.. my foot) If, u wanna go back and sleep, I will allow you and If u wanna stay, that is possible only in one condition - u have to promise You won't snore".

No Answers.

"I have been Nasty to you"

No Answers. (Nasty. Nasty... Hell ya!! u have been Nasty.)

attach**FlashBack***

The book review was allotted like a month ago. However, I realized only two days back that the book I was supposed to cover, wasn't available. I was roaming around in a corridor, where I was supposed to be interviewed for a Job that I saw the prof passing by. I informed the prof that I didn't find the particular book and instead picked another by the same author. the prof gave me a mouthful before he realized my neatly pressed suit and asked
" Are you going for a job interview?" I said "yes". " Well, then go in a good mood and talk to me in the class next day."

The next day. He asked me to submit reviews on two books. Punishment for bad planning. I had only one day to go.

So I had finished 2 book reviews of 4000 words each in one night. One of the Book was about
SBA Loan guarantees to the Bank credits by the federal government and the only thing it discussed was how badly run and managed the whole program was in the early 1950s.

Gladly it was the profs last class and thats my experience with one of the best prof i met was to end.

"Ok, So bye bye for now and all the best for your careers.Its time for me to gossip in our lobby with other teachers." Pause. and stare. ""what do you think only students gossip. Faculty also have their own juices to share. The crime committed on you is an organized one." Wide smile. "Good morning Jay and Bye"

11:15 am - I am back to my room. I check my mail-box and reply to some penis enlargement kit messages. rolleyes Oh, when would they stop.

11:45 am - I adorn myself in business casuals again and enter the CR5 (again!!), which adorned itself for a mega cola war. Yes, this time it was Pepsico presentation.

Good thing about them, they distributed us lots of free Pepsi and Mountain dew. Bad thing, I am not very fond of Pepsi products. They made us play a game in four groups named "Pepsi, Aquafina, Tropicana, Fritolay". We were supposed to solve an operation problem for them.

The Fritolay group presented an algorithm to solve their distribution problem and walked away with the prize.

1:30pm - I finished my mountain dew and walked towards the dining hall for Lunch.

2:00 pm- I come back to room. I check the Gold prices and silver prices. They had climbed further up. more losses. I sit back and wait for the prices to go down. They didn't.

5:00pm- I come back to room dejected and open my comp to see a news in www.kitco.com

"Gold prices crash from an all time high because the funds face losses".

A bit too little too late.

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by JAY @ 1:58 AM |Show/Add (7) comments|

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The pregnant woman.

Once upon a time, when Jay had a plan (refer the previous post). Aliens launched a "crack attack".. blisters sprouted on the skin.. dark clouds covered the sky.. television had "Oprah" all day... Britney won a Grammy.. Bush got a third term.

**snap**

They started drinking too many too fast. shots after shots. Cranberry nectar packs were short. During the western choreo itself, peepu and G-spot made a mess of it. Peepu started rolling all over the floor. Dopey had more than a handful to hold. Rubby was trying to pacify everyone.
To cool everyone down, we came back to the canteen. sipping coffee and chit-chatting. Fashion parade was about to begun. Suddenly, the three men (Rubby, peepu and G-spot), expressed their desire to be taken to the room. Dopey took Peepu. Komal took G-spot and I took Rubby.

That was not a good idea.

Rubby puked all over. After that, I stayed in my room looking after Rubby. Meanwhile, Fashion Parade got over and Prestorika performed in my absence. Nextday, the remorse of missing out on the metal bands' bitch-slap-kick-ass music took over Rubby and he kept abusing me for not taking care of him. I kept wondering "wtf".

and yes The Caribbeans turned the tables and whipped the naked ass of Indians.

So, we decided not to drink and spoil our plans like this again (Still we had two days of concert to go). After delivering a baby, A pregnant woman always swears not to go through all that pain again.
___________________________________________________________________
attach hangover persists.. everyone is feeling wasted . After the boring day, a round of fone calls start among the friends. I pinch everyone with a message : "I am the unconquered one as everyone else couldn't handle the vodka fest".

Rubby takes the bait: "bitch, I started drinking when u were in the womb".

"What do u say dopey, feel like drinking b4 the show?" "I just woke up and my head still hurts plus I have an assignment submission tomorrow". " ..picture two months ahead and everyone else has nothing else left in life but to watch data from Reuters on the computer screen. None of the friends would be around"

pause.pause.pause.
Dopey : " Can u get me some dope"

( Alas! After an year she gets pregnant again)


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Cranberries with the pyromaniac

Today is the third day into "Chaos". Its already 5 pm. Western Choreo is gonna start in an hour. It would be followed by Fashion Parade and then the whole nite ROCK competition to be moderated and judged by Prestorika.

Meanwhile , down south in Chennai, Indian Batsmen are murdering the Caribbeans in cricket.

To keep up the pace with all the excitement we have made arrangements to spice up our mood. We just came back from the mall and we bought Cranberry Nectar (loads), Red Bull and Lays. The news has just filtered in that Vodka wouldn't be at premium.

Rubby, Myself, Komal, G-SPOT(yes, thats his name), Peepu and Dopey planned for everything yestrday itself after a dull Remo and Mynta performance. So, we are gonna assemble in Dopey's room and gonna pour all the Vodka inside and go to the Fashion parade. (muahahahah! we would be allowed in the premium section of the crowd because we are volunteering for some logistic work in the Fashion parade and the Fashion Parade Coordinator STD is our dorm mate twisted)

Dopey has god level limits of boozing and she maintains such composure. However, her boyfriend the pyromaniac peepu would do the balancing act by going wild. Hope we will be able to keep the match box and lighter away from his sight.
Anyways. its better that he goes wild, because I would need company for my post drinking no-holds-barred act of craziness.


(thankfully, I was able to push aside all the relatives, who asked for guest passes of the shows and wanted me to be with them during the show.. he he he I am evil). In the pic, u can see pyromaniac peepu at his decent best.

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Andaz-e-Chaos

Its that time of the year again and time to go wild. Last year, I had a gala time,this year CHAOS (our rock and cultural fest) is gonna be bigger better. This is what the organizing team posted on our online NB:-

Through the Pro Nites, Andaz e Chaos aims to cherish the sparks of indiiduality in the field of Music. From international fusion to Pakistans greatest band, from the most successful indian rock musician to the qawwali maestros, we have celebrated the bold initiatives of some of the unique pioneers who made it big... and in the process, bring you the most comprehensive range of music that any cultural meet in the country has ever witnessed. Andaz e Chaos has something for every Andaz!!!

25th January

Nizami Brothers
Qawwali Their family has been singing qawwali for the last 700 years! Still continuing the legacy, the present generation has not stepped back in enthralling the connoisseurs with their craft. Acclaimed for their proficiency in the music form, Hailing from the Sikandra gharana the famous Nizami bandhu, Gulam Farid Nizami and his younger brother Chand Nizami, need little introduction.

Mrigya-Hindustani Fusion
Enter the global sound world of Mrigya, a unique fusion band from Delhi which presents a rich blend of Indian Classical music, blues, funk and latino. Mrigya stretches the boundaries of music with a sound that unites the world as one family, a philosophy which is demonstrated in the term "Vasudhaiv Kutumbakam". Mrigya became the first Indian band to get a 4 star
rating with the Scotsman at the 2001 Edinburgh Fringe Festival. This is an experience not to be missed!


26th January
Taalnaad
Headlining Act : The power of tabla

Mynta
Chaos' First Internation Band
Sweden and India find a common place in music through the ears and imagination of the group Mynta. Founded in 1979, the group has created their own genre of music, while preserving the integrity and traditions of their root sounds.
Mynta began as a regular Swedish jazz band. Its music has evolved over time, and through the years has added international dimensions. Stalwarts such as singer Shankar Mahadevan and santoor player Nand Kishore Muley have collaborated with the band. Since 1987, Fazal Qureshi, son of the legendary tabla maestro Allah Rakha and Zakir Hussains younger brother, has been one of its major forces. Mynta has a repertoire of compositions with sounds from North Africa, India and Sweden to name a few. With western instruments like the clarinet, the saxophone, the keyboards, guitars - acoustic and electric - and drums from various countries, it is quintessential fusion. visit the website for more information abt the band www.mynta.net .

Remo Fernandes

India's leading and highest-selling rock musician and being the only one in the
country to be awarded Gold Discs in this category, having song after song go Platinum and Double platinum. Has won many awards and accolades at international song festivals.Known for high-voltage excitement and total audience involvement, this man has done it all....hitch-hiked around Europe and North Africa for two-and-a-half years, singing and passing a hat around in underground stations and pedestrian streets, composing songs and writing poems, sketching and absorbing invaluable multicultural influences. He sure is a man who has done things differently - record an album in the bedroom, write and illustrate a book of poems, design postcards and t-shirts, and drive around on a yellow scooter distributing all three...."Zara Hat Ke"!!! For more information log onto http://www.remofernandes.com/


27th January2300 hrs onwards : All Night Rock Competition at RJMCEIHeadlining act and Judging byPrestorika
'Prestorika' came into being during the summr of 2001. the past years have seen
them reach the pinnacle, playing primarily heavy metal/progressive music they constantly tour the country providing their audiences with a mind-boggling set of high energy music. calling all you metal heads out there for a performance of your lifetime. visit their website for further details www.prestorika.comVarious semi professional bands from Bangalore, Mumbai, Pune and Delhi competing in the event. 28th January Gaurav DagaonkarHeadlining ActGaurav Dagaonkar is our very own alumnus who graduated from IIM Ahmedabad in 2006 and is coming out with his first album 'Om Namah Shiva' soon. From amidst the race for corporate honchos emerged this individual with a passion for music, and ended up paving his own path to his dream. It doesn't get more 'hat ke' than that !! and we celebrate him before the country would.

Silk Route

The music of Silk Route, is very much their own genre, even as they are
constantly reinventing their sound and adding to its repertoire.‘Silk Route’, which came into being in the summer of 1997 and caught the attention of the country’s music scene by bagging a host of Channel V awards for their first album Boondein, the track that still plays in our heads. Get ready for the uniquly fresh music that still never fails to amaze!!

Junoon

At present, dubbed as the 'Best Music Group' in Pakistan, this 3 man band has
goven a whole new meaning to the word 'Rock 'n Roll'. The band were one of the first bands in Pakistan to insist on playing live music where most music was sampled and programmed synth pop. Heavily influenced by rock bands like Led Zeppelin, Junoon aims at combining loud guitar riffs with the tranquility of sufi poetry. Junoon has been the first and most successful Pakistani group in history, having toured extensively around the planet, including the renowned European rock festival, Roskilde, where Pearl Jam, Iron Maiden, Travis, Queensrÿche, and over 200 other world famous artists performed. For more information please visit their official website http://www.junoon.com/
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My Inspector Cluso

pencil .Its been an year since, he had smelled the aroma of the red walls. He had returned to the college as a guest lecturer. Soon, the students realized the master of the ring hasn't lost touch as he flashed his smile and said to his audience

"Hi, Pink panther returns."

he pounces like the quintessential beast and sets the stringent rules and says he is adding one exam and an assignment to the curriculum. Looks at the response of the students laughs at them and reinforces while he is here we need to walk on the tight rope.A student tries toenter the class late he looks at him and then looks at the class. ***sigh**.

Then, he says what r u waiting for come one join the class. I understand you Its hard to wake up after 4 pegs during the nite in some1's arm.

"Anyways, since you all love me for the assignments i throw upon ya ; I no more feel comfortable and hence I reduce the work by removing one of the presentations scheduled later in the course."

Sensing the smile amongst his audience he says: "You Know. The good cop bad cop works. You guys indeed should watch the pink panther returns."

Since, removing the presentation allows you all the time to manoeuvre a bit, next week I expect everyone to submit a book review on microfinance.

He again flashes his smile: "good cop bad cop".
____________________________________________________________________________________
Later, Mr. Sriram who has returned to take our Microfinance classes; went on to discuss the Nobel peace prize winners Grameen Bank and how Daniel Pearl was pushed to oblivion.

Yes, the same Daniel Pearl.... Angelina Jolie is making a movie on. The same Daniel Pearl, who was shot to martyrdom by the terrorists in front of media glare somewhere in Pakistan. Nonetheless, a few years back he had put a front page post on Washington Post, about how not everything is right with Grameen. Since, then Grameen Bank has changed a lot and this year they won the Nobel for making a difference in the livelihood of the poor in Bangladesh. Though nowhere they recognize the findings of Daniel Pearl.


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Horrorscope

I had intuitively vowed to myself not to type down anything unless I have something substantial to put in the blog. However, I can't find time or the energy to do a nice job (which requires a lot of effort on my part unlike others for whom things flow so naturally and they keep blogging cry.)

So, finally I have decided to leave just a footstep of insignificance. Lets open the cards one by one:

.Honed my dancing skills to "smooth criminal" again. I love the kid in the video.
.Have fed myself with a lot of grunge and metal. Been rediscovering the Seattle Bands. oh! and my usual dose of some Scandinavian stuff (Royksopp again). The lovely part about such bands is they bank on a promotion which comes by word of mouth and not big banners.
.I have failed an interview (don't stare at me).
.Passport office been making me run all over.
.Had too many classes (I wish didn't attend) and the profs are so good, that I end up attending their sessions rather than sleeping in my room even if I am tired.

.I am playing a commodity trading game for the second time. Yesterday, I made money on some crude oil futures. However, I think my team is lagging. Today evening the window opens again and I hope the Gold futures will fetch me some brownie points and good money. Phatlee, my other team mate has just informed me that he won't be able to accompany me during the trading session as he has some gay presentation to attend.

___________________________________________________________________
attach Lastly, I leave you with this anecdote that a friend of mine shared during our usual 2 am CT (cafe tanstafal) get together:

Prof. Ravi Chandran had taken a bunch of 30 students on strat. Safari (an annual event where you get to visit the SEA nations and understand their sudden resurge and economic boom and a subsequent bust).

"CEO ,Johnson and Johnson, Malaysia has just delivered lecture and is involved in discussions with the students.
Amidst this serious discussion on economy, our usual CP* GOD has her itch and stands up to ask : "Sir, what are the best places to shop in Malaysia".

The frame shifts to the CEO. He smiles and stares blankly at prof Ravi Chandran.

Ravi Chandran tries some damage control measure (if wit is the greatest savior of all).

"Yeah, I know at times she asks difficult Questions"

*CP= Class participation, tendency of a student to speak in class to fetch some marks.

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Fight Club

This is one of the long lost pics of 1st year that I just found in the LAN. This used to be our regular "Fight Club" Sessions when we; the young nerds' frustrated of the Academic pressure in the first year would grapple for physical supremacy in the "top floor". We used to have "one on one"(Hard core WWE) and "pile-ups"(the pic below).

That's Rubby getting pinned down by the mighty three Peepu, Geela and Frustu.

Did u see that Ass mrgreen.



I loov this pic (Please, don tell rubby that you saw this pic has been published on the net. Dude! no one wants the proof of the fact that he was raped literally biggrin.)

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A week of turmoil

The week just gone by has been crazy and it's nothing compared to the promise that the coming three weeks hold. I have had three things in life .. work, work and work rain.

I have been tired of answering ppl that I celebrated my Christmas "in the confines of the red brick walled college". Guess what? it was nothing to what has come up now.Rubby called me and informed me of plans for the 30th and 31st. He proposed to go to "Diu" and freak out for the two days with friends.
The state I live in is a dry state which in otherwords means a restriction on alcohol rolleyes.. The only way we managed to get alcohol is by asking the foreign exchange students to get some from the monthly quota of booze they are allowed during there stay in the state.(yeah strange .. ppl with non-Indian passports are allowed, but we aren't ....discrimination and racism at the forefront.)Diu is not famous for beaches or babes, but it is the closest get away where u get to booze a lot with freedom, barely a few kilometers away from the state I live in.

Here comes the spoilsport anchor: Probably mom and dad are gonna visit the city during this weekend so I m not sure if I can spare the time and leave the city.

If that was the wound here is the saltthumbsdown : Suddenly a loads of work has come up related to the recruitment process in the college and hence, if I leave this place I will have to do so at the expense of preparation required for the recruitment season and my career(does it sound bad.. It does mad).

This means my holiday season has completely gone for a toss and so has my blogging habit.

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The Mood is Back.

A few days back, I was feeling really OLD. The "will" to play and dance seemed dead. (wtf! that can't be me). Didn't feel like playing cricket and I would returm from the court after one game.(wtf! this is me question).

However, today I felt the zing is back. I played couple of games and emrbraced the pleasure of sweating out again.Plus, I got messages from my baddie mate VASU as to when he can join in to play. He is back from his stint in Amsterdam and he has sent me a couple of pics.











(that's Vasu in Amsterdam,
click that pic to enlarge and see the magic of lightbox ;let the page upload completely and then click.)[update : Lightbox has been removed temporarily]

Ok right!!! he njoyed in the Casinos without me sad. Those two red heads... eh they are Saggy.Now, stop looking at the left-most pic and the other two are the ones so titillating. These are the two new sexy courts coming up in Vasu's dorm. His schedule is jam packed but he is so eager to join the baddie mates in the court. The Baddie club is up and jamming.Yup, now i am excited to and raring to go. We don't have any University matches coming up but we have vowed to play a lot in the next three months, which would be our last few days in University life.

Ain't the green ones sexy and hot. I am salivating. Orgasmmmm!!!!

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Lessons

After playing three continuous tiring matches and managing to lose in two... I still couldn't sleep early.. been watching a movie..The exam early in the morning was open book (it was an easy paper anyhow)..so that leaves me with the strength to ponder over the lessons learnt so far since yestrday nite.

One,
Never play if u feel u not fully fit 'ND NOT EATEN FOR THAT TWO DAYS.

Two, don't be overconfident.

Three,ignore when they say "fuk off u loser". (forgive them for they know nothing what they are saying)

Four, Don't get tired of the statement "Don't wry,... but u played well" (No matter how much of a sinking feeling it gives.)

Five, Don't think of staying in Uni for another year, So that u can play a few more matches.

Six, Take solace as to wait and watch the response of the chicks who have been watching you. (Arre, Losers impress them more.... personal opinion :P..)

Seven, Blog it and get over it and eat so that you may have the strength to Bash up the dorm mates who r gonna tease you for losing. (Already 8 ppl have asked me since morning... "How can u lose to HAT" :|)

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Eagles Vs Phoenix

Perspective: Combos (An annual interdorm sports event.)

My team: eagles (Dorm 04,15,16,17 and 19)

Eagles have virtually done a rolling stone in being no. 2 all over. We have lost the finals in Tennis, Table tennis, Basketball, Carom, Pool and couple of Computer games.Now, We are to be tested in Badminton. With the team pinning hopes, that at least the curse of blue eagle would be broken.There are other stakes too .. my non playing team members have put a bet on us [how sadistic of them :(]

Eagles player :hinges around me and Paro. Maxi can support in doubles. I am yet to find another singles player to fill the matches.

Phoenix team :Hat's team he has like 5 above average players.

Format : Best of 5

Hence, its crucial that whatever games me and paro play, we need to ensure a win. I want to play a singles, a men's doubles and a mixed doubles.I have been a singles player for the Uni. team but the doubles r crucial.



Crisis:

1. Goddamn there 2nd best singles player is injured but can still beat any of my other team members with a love game. :(( .So that makes 1-0 in their favor.

2. Maxi my doubles player is in Bangalore and he wants to play all the doubles (promises he will win them). I am skeptical and want to play one of the doubles myself. So, the two doubles cant be decided.score 1-1.

3. Paro is damn good in ladies. (however, she going through one of her personal issue). Still wd expect her to romp home.. so 1-1.

4. I would most likely be pipped against their best singles player. Though I have beaten HAT, but in practice matches he at times takes the game home and I am a slow starter.Gimme benefit of the doubt:P, then its 2-1 in our favor else we lose:((.

5. Hey!! did I tell u my recurrence of mystique in my stomach ?.. he he he.:P haven't had proper food for last two days.(But thats usual with me). I have just ordered one glucose pack and some glucose biscuits.(fuel).

6. Aaah. lolz. I got an exam 2morrow early morning.(where I have scored a D+ in the midterms.)

Your Job : still need to mention.. wish me luck .. the game will prolly start in an hr. (1 am)

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